Saturday, January 14, 2006

If who can comfort me like this song

AIR

Try to leave behind
all the pictures
in your mind
and rest your head on me
we’ll fight this
you’ll see what it means to feel free

like a secret kept forever
you are dying for some air
take a deep breath
cause you’ll never think of him
when i’m near

it’s easy to forgive
but not that easy to forget
you gave him far too much
i hope he realizes
what he just lost

like a secret kept forever
you are dying for some air
take a deep breath
cause you’ll never think of him
when i’m near

by Ephemera

13/01/06

發生了那麼多,要怎樣才能真正舒一口氣。
是不是坐下來好好的談就可以。最後確實坐下了,算是好好的談過了,那刻我以為可以。今天考驗來了發現原來不。我原諒我理解但忘記不了,無意識地不斷想起我想吐,能夠面對他但不代表同時能面對她,如果他因此覺得驚訝我會憤怒,如果他是我便會明白,就算全世界都不明白不理解都不能是他,不可以是他,我可以原諒他的自私但不能原諒他不明白這點。
其實都是我放過不了自己。面對不了她只因我面對不了自己。因為我的執意,無意識的執意。我不要什麼,那是不是什麼都不要?不是什麼都不要那我要什麼?
姊提到善待自己善待他人,我看著就想哭。要先善待他人還是先善待自己?善待了他人但殘忍了自己到不自覺,要怎樣才能善待自己?我問了自己很多遍。
原來我不懂原來我害怕懂。